LAUGHTER

It's been a while since I've laughed... I mean really laughed.
It's quite sad actually... because I love to laugh. I love being able to throw my head back and roar. I the loudest most obnoxious laugh, so I made up other laughs, so when something is really funny, but I'm with people I don't know (which is basically all the time these days) I just laugh this perfect little laugh that I made up one day... and it feels good to laugh like that, it's not a courtesy laugh, it's more genuine, but it's also not my real laugh.

Like I said, I don't know anyone, so why show them this laugh that I have, they'll just make fun of me for it.

No reason to really laugh, really to do anything... until there is.

Friday night... football and a movie. I was with this kid, this guy from one of my classes, the guy I asked to Sadie's'. He's a really funny kid, and we share the same sense of humor.

He was making me laugh so hard. I didn't even realize I'd forgotten to put my guard up and laugh like a normal person... but he has a weird laugh too.

We were at this kids' house (a different kid) and he has this movie room, me and this boy sat at the top and we were just dying. We were wheezing and laughing and, like, convulsing.

Our Conversations? Texts. #heyhowareyou #goodyou? #goodwhat'sthescore? #howamisupposedtoknow? #don'tyouhaveasmartphone? #um...yeah...noyoucan'tuseit

Complete with the hash tags. We both thought this was hilarious... although he could have just been laughing at my laugh the whole time...

But the thing is, as soon as I forgot to put up my walls, as soon as I remembered I'm allowed to be happy, everything changed

The only downfall?

#allofourconversationsarenowinhashtagsbutthat'sokaybecauseit'sreallysuperfunny.